Nothing seems more unsophisticated than an uninterrupted succession of subject-verb constructions. Take a series of sentences like the following as an example: “Moby Dick can symbolize both a manifestation of God or of the ultimate evil.”. Here are just a few of the variations you can make:
Try reading your paper out loud. If it seems choppy it can likely be remedied by your grouping short sentences into longer, more complex ones. For example:
“Gatsby’s obsession with Daisy has deeper implications. He becomes obsessed with escaping his own past.”
This would be much stronger if combined:
“Gatsby’s obsession with Daisy eventually translates into a yearning to escape his own past.”
Plain and simple. It makes your writing weak.
Bad: “This fact was proven by Napoleon’s subsequent actions.”
Good: “Napoleon proved this fact through his subsequent actions.” The object of the sentence should never be turned into the subject.
Don’t drift from the present to the past to the conditional (from “he is” to “he was” to “he would have”).
Lesson 1: Thesis Lesson 2: Introduction Lesson 3: Topic Sentences Lesson 4: Close Readings Lesson 5: Integrating Sources Lesson 6:…
Lesson 1: Thesis Lesson 2: Introduction Lesson 3: Topic Sentences Lesson 4: Close Readings Lesson 5: Integrating Sources Lesson 6:…
Lesson 1: Thesis Lesson 2: Introduction Lesson 3: Topic Sentences Lesson 4: Close Readings Lesson 5: Integrating Sources Lesson 6:…
Lesson 1: Thesis Lesson 2: Introduction Lesson 3: Topic Sentences Lesson 4: Close Readings Lesson 5: Integrating Sources Lesson 6:…
Lesson 1: Thesis Lesson 2: Introduction Lesson 3: Topic Sentences Lesson 4: Close Readings Lesson 5: Integrating Sources Lesson 6:…
Lesson 1: Thesis Lesson 2: Introduction Lesson 3: Topic Sentences Lesson 4: Close Readings Lesson 5: Integrating Sources Lesson 6:…